Review Of Prevalence, Causes And Treatment Of Delayed Ejaculation

And information about a novel treatment - anal stimulation


Definition of male orgasmic disorder

In the DSM IV diagnostic manual, male orgasmic disorder has been defined as a recurrent delay in achieving orgasm, or the inability to achieve orgasm during a timescale that would be regarded as normal taking into account a person's age, level of sexual focus, and the intensity and duration of the sexual experience. You can see that this seems to mean there is some subjective judgment involved in the definition of what constitutes delayed orgasm, but in fact the condition is easy to identify in practice, since most men who present with it simply cannot ejaculate during sexual intercourse.

It's been claimed that most men who seek treatment for delayed ejaculation or inhibited orgasm present with a pattern of situational rather than universal anorgasmia. This claim is certainly not borne out by the experience that I have had over several years dealing with sexual problems in men. Indeed, most men who have this problem report that they have always experienced difficulty in reaching orgasm inside any vagina, not just their current partner's. Often the men report that they are able to experience orgasm occasionally, and generally speaking they are having sex fairly frequently.

And for men who are in their more mature years, reassurance that ejaculation does not necessarily happen every time a man over the age of 50 has intercourse may be sufficient. But to put this forward as a treatment strategy for delayed ejaculation the majority of men is extremely unhelpful. Most men with delayed ejaculation simply cannot reach orgasm intravaginally and this causes both them and their partners considerable distress.

It's also been claimed that most men with the condition find that it has developed later in life after a series of normal sexual experiences. I would refute this claim also, because in my experience most of the men who come to me asking for help report that they have always experienced difficulty in reaching orgasm and ejaculating inside a woman's vagina.

This misinformation may well be indicative of the lack of knowledge in the medical profession around the problem. It is also untrue that delayed ejaculation is most often the result of hypoactive sexual desire disorder (a low sex drive). The thinking here is that a man simply does not wish to have sex and is only doing so because his partner is coercing him into sexual intercourse. In such cases a man may not be sexually aroused, or at least not sexually aroused sufficiently to reach the point of orgasm and ejaculation in his sexual response cycle. He is sufficiently aroused, so the thinking goes, to maintain an erection, but not sufficiently aroused to reach the normal outcome of sexual arousal, i.e. ejaculation.

Although it's true that not much research has been done on male orgasmic disorder, the fact remains that most of the men who come for treatment or who seek help report that their masturbation is normal, a fact which mitigates against the idea that delayed ejaculation is the product of low sexual desire. Nonetheless, it is clearly advantageous that any man who does have this problem is given a thorough check by medical practitioners skilled in the diagnosis of male hormonal disorders. It's also good practice to ensure that if a man has both erectile failure and male orgasmic disorder, then he should be given treatment for his erectile dysfunction before any other aspect of his sexual physiology is addressed.

One of the major aspects of my orgasmic disorder is the possibility of a pharmacological origin of the condition. There is now a vast body of evidence which implicates many modern pharmaceuticals in the inhibition of male orgasm and ejaculation. One of the first things to look at is whether or not a man is taking any drug which is known to have an inhibitory effect on male orgasm. In many cases it possible to alleviate the condition by offering an alternative medication.

Prevalence of male orgasmic disorder

Conventional wisdom claims that male orgasmic disorder is the rarest male sexual dysfunction. Studies have suggested a prevalence of up to 10%, although most studies report around 3 to 5% of men as being affected. I estimate that delayed ejaculation or some degree of delayed ejaculation affects about one in twelve of the male population; it is a seriously under-reported condition, one does not receive the attention it merits either in epidemiological studies of male sexual health, or in terms of the distress and destruction to relationships that it can cause between men and their partners.

There seems to be an opinion widespread in medical writing that because this is the rarest male sexual dysfunction it is somehow unimportant. Certainly that's a view that would seem to be borne out by the limited amount of research which has been conducted into retarded ejaculation. However, the emotional and psychological impact on those who experience it is profound and even allowing for the fact that 10% of men or less experience the condition there is still a huge body of men who require help and assistance: even 10% of men in America would mean a figure of around 10 million adult males requiring treatment. And even if the figure is inflated by the inclusion of inhibited orgasm which is caused by hypoactive sexual desire disorder the principle is still the same: men require treatment.

In particular, men with low sex drive may require investigation of hormonal levels as well as potential problems with their sexual response cycle. This is especially true of men over the age of 50 who may be experiencing the male andropause, or declining testosterone levels with associated symptoms. In other cases, the best treatment is effective psychotherapy and counseling, involving both sexual psychotherapy and relationship therapy if this is necessary.

So what causes delayed ejaculation?

While low male hormone levels can be responsible for lack of sexual desire and loss of erectile capacity, I personally think that the possibility of hormonal disorders causing male orgasmic disorder is rather low. I'd rather see it as a condition in its own right, which is usually caused by psychological factors such as self-criticism, performance anxiety, and taking the role of spectator rather than engaging fully in the sexual act.

The concept of the spectator role during sex is a recent one, and it has been emphasized in recent writing about sexual therapy. In essence, the man is focused on achieving orgasm rather than attending to his own arousal or his participation in sexual activity with his partner. This leads him into a psychological position where he becomes a highly self-critical and sexually unaroused performer or observer. It's also possible that one of the reasons why this happens is that men who do not reach orgasm are in failing relationships or have levels of anxiety, hostility, anger, guilt, shame or some other pernicious emotional syndrome which are so high that their arousal is inhibited and they are prevented from engaging fully with their own sexual arousal or participating in the sexual act with their partner in a relaxed and engaged fashion. There has been little scientific research on this condition, but those who work with men in the field have repeatedly observed that this emotional profile appears to be fairly common in either the man or his partner or both.

Physiological etiology of retarded ejaculation

Having said all of that, it is certainly true that we should not overlook the physiological conditions which are capable of inhibiting a man's orgasmic response.

Endocrinologists report that excessive prolactin levels can interfere with orgasm, so that the presence of a pituitary disorder may need to be considered. Similarly, neurological diseases, especially those which have an impact on the peripheral sensory nervous system, or which affect the functioning of the sympathetic nervous system, or any injury to the spinal-cord, can certainly affect a man's ability to ejaculate. It's actually possible for man to lose the ability to reach orgasm and ejaculate even though he can maintain erectile function.

The ejaculatory reflex appears to be more sensitive to disruptions that the erection reflex. Inhibition of orgasm and ejaculation can also be observed after surgery in some areas of the abdomen including procedures such as abdominoperitoneal or anterior resection of the rectum, sympathectomy, retroperitoneal lymphadenectomy, aortoiliac reconstruction, and surgery for bladder cancer. The common operation for benign prostate enlargement -- transurethral prostatectomy -- produces a slightly different condition known as retrograde ejaculation although orgasm itself proceeds normally.

It is also known that any drug which has a sedating effect or inhibits sympathetic arousal, or raises serotonin levels in the brain, may markedly inhibit or even totally prevent orgasm and ejaculation. Interestingly enough, these agents include alcohol antidepressants, antihypertensives, antipsychotic, and antianxiety medications.

Because male orgasmic disorder is not subject to much investigation, there's little systematic research or data available regarding the outcome of any kind of therapy treatments. Nonetheless, anecdotal evidence from men who have received the right kind of therapy suggest that psychotherapy can actually be very effective in dealing resolving this problem, although it goes without saying that a man must be willing to look at his deepest issues and possibly also the implications for his relationship with his partner.

So what does psychotherapeutic treatment for male orgasmic disorder actually entail?

The usual treatment adopted for delayed ejaculation is around reducing and eliminating performance anxiety and establishing a high level of sexual self-confidence. The self-critical observer needs to be disempowered, and the man needs to be taught how to engage fully in sexual activity with his whole presence (emotional, physical and spiritual) so he is  focused on the sensations that he's experiencing in the moment, and not on the achievement of orgasm - in either himself or his partner.

Clearly the provision of adequate levels of physical stimulation so that the man is sufficiently sexually aroused to allow him to achieve orgasm and ejaculation is a vital part of the treatment. Simply issuing instructions to the couple that they should stimulate his penis manually and/or orally until he has an erection, while stopping the stimulation as he approaches the point of no return is a futile treatment strategy, since the man is usually unable to approach the point of no return anyway. The objective is to reduce anxiety about the goal on which the man is focused, which is usually around orgasm, either his own or his partner's and to enable him to enjoy sexual pleasure from caressing and stimulation. The only effective treatment methodology that I'm aware of which encompasses these objectives is the process of sensate focus to ensure that the man is actually more in connection with his own body, more aware of his own arousal, and more relaxed with his partner.

Clearly it is necessary to ensure that the man is on a medical regime which does not interfere with his ability to ejaculate. The most common medications which are implicated in this respect are SSRI antidepressants that do not also block the 5-hydroxytryptamine type 2 (HT2) receptor.

One study has reported that there are five treatment strategies which can limit the side-effect of these antidepressants. The first is to wait for the accommodation to the side-effect to occur, although this is only likely to happen in fewer than one patient in ten.

Clearly a better strategy is to switch to a different medication with fewer side-effects. A drug holiday is also possible, as is reducing the dosage. Another option is to apply a pharmacological antidote to the side-effect of the antidepressant although this clearly has implications for further side-effects. Yohimbine has been suggested as one candidate for this role, although a number of other compounds have been suggested including amantadine (Ashton et al. 1997; Balogh et al. 1992; Shrivastava et al. 1995), cyproheptadine (Ashton et al. 1997; Feder 1991; McCormick et al. 1990; Segraves 1993), stimulants (Bartlik et al. 1995), bupropion (Ashton and Rosen 1998b; Labbate and Pollack 1994), buspirone (Landen et al. 1999; Norden 1994), and sildenafil (Ashton 1999; Ashton and Bennett 1999; Nurnberg et al. 1999).

Another approach that may be overlooked is simply to provide more physical stimulation to enable man to achieve orgasm more easily. 

This may include some method of increasing physical stimulation of the sexual and genital areas, including the scrotum, penis, perineum, and anus. One effective method of doing this is to use an anal stimulation probe which may provide extra simulation through application of a mild electric current or through vibratory stimulation.

A traditional treatment method for delayed ejaculation has involved the patient learning to masturbate. In the cases where the man himself is actually able to achieve orgasm during masturbation, this traditional treatment has involved his partner using manual stimulation on his penis, with a prohibition on intercourse. That's because intercourse is the very activity that causes the man to be more goal-focused than self-focused during sexual activity.

The man needs to be in a mental space where he is simply enjoying the sensations of stimulation and arousal without any overt attempt to reach orgasm. The theory is that if the man approaches the point of no return, he or his partner is to  discontinue stimulation and relax until his arousal has dropped.

However, as I observed before, the problem with this approach is that most men with male orgasmic disorder cannot reach orgasm through stimulation by their partner. While the theory is fine, the practice is rather lacking. The idea is that the man will go through several cycles of stimulation and relaxation without any orgasm and ejaculation at the end of the session. This is supposed to behaviorally condition the man so that he is unable to prevent himself from having an orgasm during sexual stimulation at some point in the future.

When he does reach orgasm the therapy methodology is adapted so that the man then only reaches orgasm when he feels it's going to happen despite the lack of intention on his part. It's fair to say that this is a poorly defined treatment strategy and it's also fair to say that it probably does not work.

Those men who can masturbate orgasm on their own, but cannot with a partner, are given a modified treatment strategy which is designed to overcome their inhibitions about displaying the loss of control associated with orgasm. For example, a man may be asked to role-play having an orgasm in a very dramatic fashion, acting as though he was out of control, or engaging a partner in the role-play as though she were out of control.

When men fear loss of control it's possible that such exaggerated role-play can be effective in reducing embarrassment and shame and lowering man's inhibition about letting his partner see him having a real orgasm. However, it will not have escaped your notice that none of this addresses any emotional dynamic in the relationship such as hostility, shame or guilt between the partners.

As the man is able to establish orgasm more reliably, the sexual repertoire that the couple engage in can be expanded to encompass oral sex, passive containment of the penis in the vagina, intercourse and thrusting by the man, and synchronous thrusting by both partners. As before, any attempt to reach orgasm is initially prohibited, being allowed only when the man finds that he is approaching orgasm spontaneously.

The problem is that most of the men who seek help need considerable assistance with reducing performance anxiety and achieving greater arousal. This means that they need a more sophisticated methodology than the one described above. One method that has been used to achieve this is instruction in "orgasm triggers", which is a method used to help women who are anorgasmic achieve orgasm more easily. I quote: "Orgasm triggers are physiological events that tend to occur spontaneously and involuntarily when a person has orgasm. With  experience, many people come to perform the orgasm triggers voluntarily when they are highly aroused, both to initiate their orgasm and to heighten its intensity. Orgasm triggers include arching the foot and pointing the toes, tensing the thigh muscles, contracting the pubococcygeal muscle and bearing down in the pelvis, caressing and squeezing the scrotum against the perineum, holding the breath in a Valsalva maneuver (i.e., attempting to exhale against a closed glottis), and throwing the head back to displace the glottis. However, telling a patient to perform all of these maneuvers at once to trigger an orgasm would certainly interfere with arousal and would lead to a performance-oriented spectator role! To avoid this negative effect, orgasm triggers are introduced sequentially over a few sessions, with each one described as a way to heighten pleasure and not initiate orgasm."

A novel treatment method for retarded ejaculation

Another powerful method of achieving greater physiological stimulation is to use anal stimulation. Many men have a problem with this because they naïvely believe that this is somehow associated with homosexual orientation. However stimulation of the anus can in fact trigger a reflex orgasmic response.

Anal stimulation can be achieved by a finger or an anal vibrator, and this actually is very effective (much more effective than applying a vibrator to the penis, a method which has limited effect). If the couple wish to include anal exploration and stimulation as part of sexual activity then they should start in the shower so that concerns about hygiene can be reduced.


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[ Delayed ejaculation - retarded ejaculation - how to ejaculate during sex ]

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Your boyfriend or husband can't come during sex or orgasm during intercourse ] What is delayed ejaculation? Why you can't ejaculate during sex ] Stopping delayed ejaculation ] Causes and effects of delayed ejaculation - retarded ejaculation ] Treatment of delayed ejaculation ] Dealing with male anorgasmia ] Cure for delayed ejaculation (male orgasmic disorder) ] Treatment for retarded ejaculation - delayed ejaculation ] What causes delayed ejaculation? ] Case study of delayed ejaculation - a couple with retarded ejaculation ] Boyfriend unable to orgasm during sex, husband unable to ejaculate ] Case history of delayed ejaculation ] Sexual therapy for delayed ejaculation ] Causes of DE ] The causes and treatment of delayed ejaculation ] Scientific research on DE ] Causes and treatment of DE ] Medical view of delayed ejaculation / retarded ejaculation ] Personal experiences of delayed ejaculation ]

Unable to orgasm during sex or intercourse?

Don't despair! We have the answers.

If you have delayed ejaculation, you may think you are the only one with this problem, but the truth is as many as one man in ten has the problem at any one time. Happily, there are simple and easy techniques which will help you to ejaculate during sex - and you can use them in the privacy of your own home! Click on the link to find out how you can easily overcome delayed ejaculation and ejaculate normally during sex.